Twitter..The Joint Family Equivalent

Most of you know that Twitter is a social networking site. But what you don't know is that it's an equivalent of being in a joint family.

There is no such thing as privacy since everything happens on a public timeline. From what you're eating to where you're going...who you're friends are....who you're fighting with.....who's happy....who's sad....we know it all.

Personally I love being surrounded and loved by all these people but I do concede that at times it can get annoying. The lack of privacy, the nosiness, the questions. Everyone knows everyone's business. One sad/angry tweet can fill up your timeline with countless queries from people wanting to know what's wrong. That's the way it works....we live, laugh, fight and cry together openly for all to see.

You must be wondering what's my point? In the last few days I've come across a few instances where people have gotten upset with what they probably think is an invasion of privacy. I admit we do overstep our boundary at times. But that's not coz we're nosy. We genuinely care about the people we interact with. It's not gossiping......it stems from loving. So please keep that difference in mind next time you get pissed off......coz only when you loose this love and caring will you understand how precious it is. But it will be too late....you will no longer be a part of this wonderful and loving joint family!!!

Cut Your Losses

The saying "cut your losses as quickly as possible" has been on my mind today. And I am seriously pondering on the wisdom of doing so.

There are times no matter how hard you try things don't work. But most times we just carry on, knowing there's no point because it's oh so difficult to let go. 

I think the biggest reason we want to hang on to things is because there is a certain comfort level in the known. You know the good, bad and ugly and you figure you'll deal with it. 

I can think of so many instances when I've let things pass saying chodo. But I've realized that letting things pass is like slow poisoning. It kills you slowly but surely. 

Am seriously tempted to cut my losses on a certain situation. But the fact that I'm debating in my mind tells you that I am having trouble letting go. Wanting to hang on. Knowing fully well that if I do, this particular situation will bug me every few days. But still debating. When will I learn?

OMG

The photo says it all. I took it last night on my way back home and at that point of time I couldn't help but say OMG and laugh. I mean come on, this is Delhi, the national capital. It was hilarious.

Later though when I thought about it, I felt a bit sad and a bit mad. Sad because a whole lot of people in our country are illiterate and for them it's just a print. They don't know that the wrong side is up and I really don't blame them. They are poor workers doing their job of hanging a board where it's supposed to be hung.

Then comes the mad part. Someone obviously has not done their job properly and that's the reason these boards are upside down. If the guy who was "supposedly" supposed to supervise has paid even 1% attention, he would have seen what you and I, the educated lot can see. But he didn't and so we can all look at this photo and have a good laugh.

BloodAid ~ A Non-Profit Initiative

I recently heard about a new non-profit initiative from some friends and was really impressed. So I thought I'd share it with all of you. It's called BloodAid, an online portal which aims to connect genuine donors with people who are desperately in need of blood in case of emergency.

We all come across such cases where someone needs blood urgently and at that point of time we end up racking our brain trying to figure out someone we know with a matching blood type. Now we know where to go. This site has voluntary donors from all blood types who one can get in touch with in case one requires blood and it's FREE .

I remember the time when I needed two units of blood before a surgery and it was pretty stressful trying to figure out where to get it from. At that time my Mom and Sister had given what was needed and I still remember feeling very grateful in my heart especially since they both have an absolute horror of needles.

A lot of us don't really pay much attention to these blood requests when we see them. I guess it's because it's someone, somewhere, and it generally doesn't touch us enough to be active about it. But let me tell you when it's someone we love who needs it....that is the time we really understand just how precious donating blood is.

So please please please check out www.bloodaid.com and spread the word about it to all your friends. You never know, someday, somewhere, by doing so, you just might be instrumental in saving a life.

It's Dillogical

What's most important......heart or mind? Logically I would say the mind but a lot of times the heart takes over and we become dillogical.

I normally pride myself as someone in control of my emotions and reacting logically to most situations life throws at me. As I said....most of the time. But there are those few times when my heart takes over and totally throws my mind and all logical thought out of the window.

Is that good or bad? Again logically I would say it's bad since when we are emotional we only go by what we feel and our decisions are based on emotion. We do not think or react by weighing the pros n cons of a given situations. But hey.....we are all human beings and need to remember that when we get dillogical :)

Behind The Scene

It's been a long time since I updated my blog......a combination of being busy and out of sorts with myself. Though if I were to be honest, it's more my state of mind than anything else that's kept me away.

What have I been doing the last couple of months? Family, friends and a little amount of work. A friend was in hospital, someone in the family was ill and passed away, all of which took up almost a month. The next month was taken up with festivals starting with Durga Puja followed by Dushera finally culminating with Diwali.

Since I live in a mainly Bengali neighborhood there are pandals all around my house and I spent the whole Pujo playing host to various friends who visited. Walked till my feet hurt and ate like there was no tomorrow. By the end, even my stomach had said enough. Durga Puja is party time for Bengali's and the amount of food stalls in the pandals are a foodies delight. You name it and they have it. From chat to bhelpuri to tikka's to burra kababs and more. I ate out all five days.

Dushera was spent with friends at Khan Market where we ate, drank and watched Ravan burn. With Diwali approaching there were trips to Old Delhi, made easy with the brand new metro running. One of the special trips out of those was with two of my friends when we went candle shopping. We brought bags full of them lugging them back with difficulty on the metro.

Diwali was mainly time spent at home with family. It was as hectic as ever and let me add, this year the pollution was terrible. I remember driving that night and there were pockets where I actually need to put on my emergency lights because the visibility was so poor.

So that's the busy part of the last two months....the out of sorts part shall stay private inside my mind. Sorry for depriving you of all the masala chatpata bits :P

Make Or Break

It takes so much time to make something and just minutes to break it. All that goes into it becomes naught!

That's a sad truth of life. Be it relationships, buildings or a business. Relationships were more on my mind when I thought about writing this post but now that I think more along these lines....it applies to everything in life.

It took minutes to bring the twin towers down. An accident could totally smash to pieces a brand new car. A business gone under becomes impossible to revive. Relationships once broken can never be the same again.

So much effort goes into a relationship. Time, energy, love, affection, and sometimes it all ends with nothing left to show for it. Just a bunch of memories. This is true for every kind of relationship...friends or lovers and sometimes even family. A word, deed, greed or worst, lack of feeling, unravels even the strongest bond.

I wonder why we are so helpless to prevent things like this from happening in a relationship. Is it our fault? For being blind and not seeing what's before our eyes or does it change suddenly.

You can know someone for years and suddenly realize that you don't know the person at all. You don't even like the kind of person he or she has become. You watched it all happen and still didn't see. At that point of enlightenment the thread snaps and that's the end. Gone forever.

Can we do something? Probably not. I'm a fatalist and believe it's all in God's hand. Everything happens for a reason. A lot of you will disagree but that's my personal point of view. So I do my best to make and if God decides to break.......I just go with the flow.

It's A Mad Mad Mad Mad World

It's a mad mad mad mad world. Everyday around me I see signs of this. "We the people" are actually quiet crazy in our own different ways.

I spend a lot of time observing people around me. Most people love to talk especially about themselves, and boy, can they talk. The more they talk, the clearer it is to see all kinds of kinks in them. They all come tumbling out. Now I am sure I have quite a few of them myself but, the advantage I have over others is that it takes a while for people to figure them out.

A friend and I were recently discussing some of the people we both know....not maliciously.....just generally and were laughing about how strange and quirky people, including ourselves, are.

As I said......it's a mad mad mad mad world :P

PS : This is just a random thought and my intention is not to offend anyone so please take it in the spirit that it has been written. Thanks :)

Jai Hind

Today India celebrates Independence day and I am a proud Indian. So I thought I'd share this song on the blog to mark the day. It's one of my favorite songs from the movie Purab Aur Paschim. Happy Independence Day and Jai Hind.

Rain

Rain.....we get so little of it in Delhi but whenever we do I feel so rejuvenated. Dark sky, thunder and lightening.....awesome.

I've always loved rain ever since I was a little girl. I have some great memories associated with it. Endless times when I went driving, got wet or walked in the rain. Memories that I'll always cherish even as I go on to make new ones every monsoon.

Yesterday it rained....only for an hour or so but my brother and I went up to the terrace and got totally drenched. I was walking around barefoot as the raindrops fell hard and fast. As far as the eye could see it was green and clean and rain.

Of course in just a couple of hours, the sun made his entry back into our lives, mocking our short lived pleasure and leaving us yearning for more rain...

Zindagi

Zindagi...kaisi hai paheli haaye, Kabhi to hansaaye kabhi ye rulaaye, Zindagi.....

Have been humming this song all day....don’t know where it came from and I wasn’t even consciously thinking about it. Suddenly I registered the words and thought to myself....how true!

Life is such a puzzle.....in a span of moments we go from one emotion to another. Take my day today for example...have been like a yoyo, my mood changing moment to moment. I remember feeling a bit lost in the evening for no reason at all. I distracted myself and got into a better frame of mind and then got a work call which totally wound me up again. So many ups and downs which never last.....constantly changing. Zindagi.... :)

PS : For all those who don’t know which song I am talking about.....here it is from Anand.

Heaven...

Today is a one of those rare days when I'm home alone and totally enjoying my solitude. Doesn't happen often in my house since the family always feels "baby" should not be left alone.

Awesome weather in Delhi, lots of rain and cool. Sitting without the fan, drinking endless cups of earl grey chai , listening to my most favorite slow romantic numbers and thinking my own thoughts.

Heaven...

Tech Savvy

I am sooooo dumb when it comes to technology.....of any kind. It goes right over my head. But I try, sometimes without success, to figure things out.

You can’t imagine how many hours day after day I put into understanding whatever comes my way. Frustrating hours where I feel like kicking my brain coz I just don’t get it.

I so envy the people who know exactly what it’s all about. In fact am surrounded by them. They have to bear me and my dumb questions day in and day out. And they help all they can with a little bit of good natured teasing. I can’t complain...I deserve it.

This post is dedicated to all the smart people out there who are tech savvy. I am full of admiration for them. I pray that they are always by my side to guide me when I get stuck. May they get smarter and smarter so that I can pick their brains and at least give the impression of being a bit tech savvy!

My Most Favorite Poem

I am not a big fan of poetry. I just don't get it. Unless it's very simple and rhymes. But there is this one poem by Sarojini Naidu which I love.

I love it because it speaks of life.....a life which is difficult at times. It talks about how everything passes especially the bad and the ugly, of new dreams and beginnings and hope. So I thought I'd share it on the blog.

This is something I always recite to myself when the going gets really really tough and I also have this irritating habit of sending it to all those friends who I feel are in need of a little pepping up. So here it goes......... :)

Transience

Nay, do not grieve tho' life be full of sadness,
Dawn will not veil her splendour for your grief,
Nor spring deny their bright, appointed beauty
To lotus blossom and ashoka leaf.

Nay, do not pine, tho' life be dark with trouble,
Time will not pause or tarry on his way;
To-day that seems so long, so strange, so bitter,
Will soon be some forgotten yesterday.

Nay, do not weep; new hopes, new dreams, new faces,
The unspent joy of all the unborn years,
Will prove your heart a traitor to its sorrow,
And make your eyes unfaithful to their tears.

Sarojini Naidu

It’s Not Rocket Science

I am bewildered at the way this country works. Seriously. Someone, somewhere thinks (or not) in a way that's beyond me.

A few months ago the area in front of our lane was cemented. Very good.....they’re thinking of ways to make the city look cleaner. A few weeks ago the road in front of my house was re-laid. Even better. And then guess what? They start DIGGING.

They dig all the cement out (some new drain being made in order to harvest rain water) and pile all the mud on to the road. I mean forget about the fact that this is the rainy season....that’s normal coz they always dig roads during this time. The whole dug out mud washes on the newly laid road making a total mess of it.

To add insult to injury, they don’t even work on it every day. A whole stretch is out of action making it very difficult for all of us to park our cars plus traffic is a mess. In over a week they haven't done 10 yards.

Forget about our inconvenience. Can they not figure out for themselves that they just wasted all the money that went into cementing and relaying? Can they not think and plan better? I mean come on......it’s not rocket science!

Rupee Symbol

The Indian rupee got a symbol yesterday and I was super excited. So excited that I talked about it to anyone and everyone who crossed my path.

There had been talk about it for the last few weeks and I was waiting to see which one finally got approved. Not that it really matters if we got one or what it looked like since it doesn't change the value of the rupee but it was something new to look forward to.

The suspense is over. We know what it looks like but alas when I wrote it, I realised that it didn't look so nice written in my handwriting. Since then some of my euphoria has dissipated and now am not so sure if I like the symbol we've got :(

Life Is A Bitch

Life can be a real bitch. And it is......most times.

New twists and turns down an unknown path. Tempting us with what we cannot have. Possibilities that never become realities. Yearnings that last forever.

It gives you a glimpse of heaven only to take it away. It never lets you forget the moment you let slip away. Right or wrong it's forever gone. All you are left with is life and it is a BITCH!

His Holiness The Dalai Lama

If there is one person I admire in this world, it is His Holiness. There is something about him that draws me. His persona, his dignity, his way of talking and most of all his philosophy.

Growing up in India I knew all about him but my fascination for him actually started when I read his autobiography. That gave me a glimpse into his personality and thought process and that’s when the admiration took firm root. I continued my reading on him and his teachings. The more I read....the more I admired.

Today I try to walk the path that he teaches. I don’t always succeed but at least I try.

Wishing His Holiness The Dalai Lama a belated Happy Birthday.....may you have a long long life.

Why?

We the people, are such strange strange creatures. Seriously! And that includes me.

We all have our moments of joy and sorrow. When joy is visiting we never ever ask why...but when sorrow comes calling, our first question is WHY?

Why this contradiction.....why are we made like this? At a time when we are at our lowest.....this question haunts our mind, plunging us deeper into sorrow. It happens with every single one of us. Most of us question.....whyyyyyy???

I wish God had fixed this particular default in our system. It would have made life a lot easier.....not to have to wonder why.

Micheal Jackson (1958 - Forever...)

Micheal Jackson was and always will be the King of Pop and his music will live on forever and ever...Rest in Peace.



Title phrase via Mohit Girotra.

The Best Thing That Ever Happened To Me

It’s exactly a year since I joined twitter and it was the best thing that ever happened to me. My world has changed so much, for the better, since I became a part of this wonderful family.

It would be difficult to explain to someone who is not on it coz it’s beyond comprehension. It is a big huge world full of love and support and caring and sharing.

I have met so many wonderful people there. Some have gone on to become great friends, there for me 24x7, sharing my joy and lifting me out of my sorrow every single day. I won’t take names coz that wouldn’t be fair but each one of them knows how much they mean to me. They are an integral part of my life and I can’t do without them.

Twitter ROCKS and I love you Tweeple!

The Only Thing I Love About Fifa 2010

Shanti Shanti Shanti

Shanti.....I'm not talking about a woman by that name, in case you're wondering. I am talking about peace. Peace around me.

The last week has been crazy with a houseful of relatives which included two kids. Now don't get me wrong.....I loved having them over.......but I missed my quiet time with self. Time to be with my own thoughts.

There was always something going on. People around, talking and generally creating mayhem in my life. My room, which is my own private haven, an open house to all. Every time I locked myself in, someone came knocking.

They left today and finally there is shanti!

This Happens Only In India

I took this picture a couple of days ago, you can guess looking at it, at a railway station. And believe you me, I was struck dumb though I should not have been. After all this is India.

Nizamuddin Railway Station, platform number 1, the train just pulling in and we have not just these two in the picture but a whole lot of donkeys strolling through the platform as though this is something that they do on a daily basis.

They probably do....but I saw it for the first time and frankly all I could do was shake my head in wonder and gape at them.....dumbfounded.

What's more, one poor donkey somehow managed to get off the platform on to the track in the path of the approaching train and was on his way to donkey heaven with all of us watching in horror when someone, probably one of the owners, came to his rescue and pushed him on to the next track.

I must say.......this happens only in India!

Hello Blog.....I Miss You.

Its been a case of long time no see my darling blog and I feel terrible about it. So I thought I'd say hello.

The last few weeks have been a bit chaotic and as a result, my mind has been allover the place.....which BTW is normal for me. But I miss you and I know that you miss the attention that I have not been giving you.

I hope that I get over this distracted state of mind soon and we go back to spending some quality time together. Until then....please miss me too.

The Sound Of Silence

Does silence speak? I think it does. When you actually listen to it, you hear all that you don’t when you’re mired in sound.

I live in Delhi…..a bustling city which is never silent apart from those few hours at night. And living amidst all this chaos, I don’t think about the sound of silence. My mind is so tuned to the mayhem around me that I completely shut it out.

That’s one reason why I love going to Jaipur. There I am totally cut off from the daily sounds of my life (including my phone which is on silent the whole time) and I listen…..in peace.....to all that it has to say.

Birds chirping from morning till evening and even at night, the ripple in the water, the leaves moving gently in the breeze……..the sound of silence.

Third Time Lucky

Last week I was in Jaipur for a short holiday and thought I’d spend some quality time in the hotel garden. As soon as I walked down, my eyes fell on the hammock which was temptingly swinging lightly in the breeze, tied between two Gulmohar trees in full bloom. So I ran to it, kicked off my shoes and immediately got on.

Alas…..the balance on it was out and humpty dumpty fell off not once but twice. Totally embarrassing since there were three gardeners watering the garden who witnessed the fall. This picture is a result of the third try…..thanks to one kind gardener who held the hammock while moi got on. Third time lucky :D

Yeh Dil Mange More

While reading a book by HH Dalai Lama I came across this quote where he talks about discontentment. “You want more and more and more. This, in a sense, is real poverty – always to be hungry, hungry, hungry with no time to be satisfied.”

One part of my mind recognises the truth of this statement. But, somewhere this understanding clashes with my desire of wanting more and more and more. There is an endless list of things I want in life. Things which, to my mind, are desperately needed to make life worth living.

Since then, I’ve been thinking about wanting verses needing. I want but do I need? Not really. I have all that I need to live a very comfortable life. But still this endless wanting continues. I guess it’s a case of “yeh dil maange more”!

Shaken & Stirred

Life I’ve noticed, has a tendency of constantly getting shaken and stirred. It’s never stable and a lot of times to my mind, especially in my life, I could certainly do without some of the shaking around that God deems necessary for my existence.

I wonder if it’s just me…..no of course not, it’s everyone but since this is my blog, I shall just moan about myself.

A lot of times, when I find myself totally at peace, God pokes me in such a way that the peace is shattered and I’m totally out of sync. It’s happening right now, my mind a total mess and I do not think it is needed in my life at all. But I guess God does.....so He’s going to keep at it. And He’s welcome to, since I know this is to teach me an important lesson in life. All I’ll say to Him is……please “handle with care”.

PS: No questions on this post please. Thanks :)

25 Random Things About Me.

I was recently tagged in a note on Facebook where I was supposed to write 25 things about me. So since I wrote them down, I thought I’d post them here as a record of 25 “GREAT” things about me.

1. I am an extremely lazy person……to the extent that at times I get tired just thinking about all the things that I have to do.

2. I am also an extremely private person……hate sharing my thoughts.

3. I am a big reader thought mostly fiction. Can’t stand non-fiction which I find very boring. Love reading romance. I guess am a total romantic at heart.

4. I am totally blind without my lenses and as of last month need glasses to read too. The joys of growing old.

5. I am slim n trim….o.k. lying a bit about that but a little cheating is allowed.

6. I am totally uninterested in clothes. Just get the basics and that’s it.

7. I am not a great talker…..in fact I hate talking most of the time.

8. I am a great listener…..now this is one of my special points. You wanna talk….you’ve come to the right person.

9. I am a total non vegetarian……hate all those green vegetables which are so good for me. Give me tikka n butter chicken n kababs…..let’s not talk about it.

10. I looooooove chai. Anytime, anywhere….my most favourite drink.

11. I am a Libran, so, there is a constant struggle going on in my mind all the time while I try and bring balance to my thoughts

12. I am totally non tech. I am sooooo dumb when it comes to any kind of technology….....just goes over my head.

13. My take on life….one life to live so live it up…….kya pata kal ho na ho.

14. I am warm n loving if you matter…..if you don’t matter, you don’t figure in my scheme of things.

15. I am an absolute believer in Fate.

16. I hate any kind of controversy….again a Libran trait

17. I love spending time with myself.

18. The most amazing place I ever been to is Bodhgaya………………the energy was mind-blowing.

19. My favourite holiday destination is Jaipur. I go 3-4 times a year.

20. The one place I dream of visiting……Venice

21. The person who’s philosophy I try and follow is HH Dalai Lama……unsuccessfully.

22. The person I love the most is my nephew Aabir.

23. My most prized possession right now is my laptop which is getting old n ill with overuse.

24. The creature I hate the most is the lizard. Horrorssssssssssssssss

25. I hated writing these 25 things about myself.

Too many I’s in this post…sorry guys.

PS: I chickened out and did not put this up on FB :)

Art of Justification

To err is human…..and to be able to justify that error is even more human. No matter what we do, right or wrong, in the end we justify it to ourselves.

Today a friend and I were gleefully downloading music of a yet to be released movie from a free site when another friend commented…..pirates!!! I was startled….my pleasure in the music destroyed.

I sat brooding, lost in thought for a few minutes. I am someone who has very strong ideas of right and wrong. But somehow I had never really thought about this in the context of right or wrong. I mean this is India. We buys movie CD’s the day after a movie is released, books which are reprinted, pirated software for our computers and download music from a free website. Everyone does it.

As my mind was churning and floating, it started to come up with a story for justifying the free download. By downloading music as opposed to buying a CD (frankly speaking how many of us would actually buy as much music as we download) we listen to it all, talk about it to other people and help make the music popular. A buzz is created and more people end up going to watch the movie in the theatre when it is released. So ultimately the film profits from this free download.

By the time I came to the end of this particular justification I felt immensely better and started enjoying my free downloaded music again.

Bottom line…….any wrong can be made right by applying the “Art of Justification”!

Confession

Earth hour was on the 27th of March and I am happy to say that I switched off all my lights. But I must confess, the whole day I was vacillating between wanting to follow it and pretending to forget about it.

While this whole debate was going on in my mind I realized how totally selfish it was of me to want to forget about it. I didn’t want to sacrifice those 60 minutes of my life in order to be part of a cause. And it’s not like I would have been doing anything earth shattering in that one hour. I would have been either watching television or listening to music or surfing the net. Nothing that important!

Since I did follow the earth hour call….I am now, actually proud of myself for not having given in to temptation.

PS : I did spend that whole hour on the phone :)

Men And Their Libidos

Saw a news report about a 12 year old girl raped by 9 people for two years. Nothing new……happens all the time with even younger girls but it leaves me totally disgusted every time I hear about it.

What is the story with men/boys and their libidos……..that it goes so totally out of control and they end up behaving like animals. Now I’m not saying all men. But the statistics that we have show that there are plenty around. We read about them every single day……some man, somewhere……..

The question…….what is their problem? Is it mental or physical? Are they totally deprived of any kind of feeling? Is the greed for sex so great that they have to rape someone to feed it?

In our country there are enough women around who would sleep with a man for money. So why do they need to resort to rape? How do they live with themselves after they do?

Pretty sick I must say!

Yikessssssssssssss

Summer is here and it brings along a special gift………the lizard. Yikessssssssssssss.

I just sighted my first lizard of the season and frankly it filled me with horror. There is nothing I hate more in the world than a lizard...........ugly, slimy and the most repulsive creature ever.

Now I wonder if I can apply The Dalai Lama’s theory of compassion to it……I think it would be stretching it a bit too far. Even if it means incurring bad karma for being mean to a living creature…..the minute I see one……I want to kill it (not with my own hands……I can’t bear to look at it).

I don’t know where this dislike stems from………maybe my childhood. I had a lizard fall on me when I was a little girl and I still remember the cold clammy feel of it as it touched my skin. HORRIBLE!

I wish I lived in a country where this particular creature was extinct…..actually why can’t this become like the tiger……..whose numbers are dwindling…….so that we could soon have a lizard free India. God, are you listening?

Joy Of The Forbidden

The Navratras are on…….the time when Hindus who believe in Shakti/Devi go on a fast, pray and turn totally vegetarian. I’m a Hindu but alas, from the day they start, I get this strong craving to eat meat which is blasphemous.

I am not someone who eats a lot of meat. I generally eat home food, which is mostly vegetarian, though with a certain amount of cribbing. So it is strange that I get these cravings throughout the nine days when I am supposed to be vegetarian.

I live in a home where all non-vegetarian food is thrown out the night before the navratras start. My family grows the khetri and puja is done all nine days, two times a day. My Mom fasts for eight days. So you can imagine how it feels to be so out of sync with the family. Do I care…not really. Do I worry that Ma Durga will get upset….no....coz I know she’s not judging me on this.

I mostly end up eating meat at least once during this period, though not at home. And let me tell you.......when you get a strong craving for something which is forbidden and manage to get it......that is the time when you enjoy it the most.

Streetwalkers!

A lot of times if I go over the Defence Colony flyover at night, I see the street lined with women dressed to kill. They are the “Streetwalkers”, hanging around waiting to be picked up by men for some amount of money. A lot of traffic stops around there in the hope of striking a deal……some stop just for fun. There are times when I have to crawl along that stretch since the going gets really slow.

Being a woman, I always feel extremely sad when I see these women. They are just like me, women, human beings. The only difference is that they are probably caught in a circumstance which makes them do it. And a lot of times I wonder what they must go through standing there. They all seem happy and totally o.k. with what they do. But is that for real or just a façade, where they do what they have to do. Do they switch off their minds and just go with the flow. Or do they hate every second of it. Frankly my mind boggles.

I can’t even imagine living a life like that. A new man, or rather several new men every night. It gives me the creeps. And that is when I am so thankful to God for giving me the life that I have. Of having been born in the family that I was born into. It’s just pure luck……or you could call it karma. Whatever it is, for myself I’m extremely grateful but my heart really goes out to these women who, come rain or cold, are always there.

What is love?

What is love? It's a really big question. And a complicated one. But only if you have never experienced it.

So here's my take on it. Short and sweet. Love is when the one you love is more important to you than your own self. We as human beings have a "me first" attitude in life. We love ourselves the most. When that takes a backseat, for me that's love. When you think of that someone before yourself, you know it's the real thing. Until that happens......it is not.

Nanak Dukhiya Sab Sansar

Nanak Dukhiya Sab Sansar...now I don't know the exact translation of this but what I understand by this Punjabi saying is that everyone in this world is unhappy. Every single person in this world has some problem or the other....it could be money, health, love, children, work etc. And that is true universally....it's a common reality which encompasses everyone and doesn't spare anyone.

Even though its prevalent in everyone's life what is different is the way people deal with it. Some deal with it in a positive manner whereas others find it difficult to live with it.

I know lots of people who have lots of things wrong with their lives...we all do. And I see a lot of them cribbing and crying about their lot in life. As though they are the only ones with problems. Life's a bitch....for everyone, and frankly cribbing about it is not gonna make it better....it's not gonna solve anything. All it does is make u feel more overwhelmed and unhappy. So whats the point?

There are others who just go along with a smile on their face and wait for it to pass. They don't make a big hullabaloo about it and just carry on doing what is needed to be done.

Learn to live with the fact that this is just the way it is and smile along the way...if nothing else it'll be a more pleasant journey than if you had spent it cribbing. If being unhappy doesn't lessen the lot on your plate then believe you me trying to be cheerful as you deal with it will not make that same lot bigger.

PS : I get a lot of visitors on this post who are looking for the correct translation of "Nanak Dukhiya Sab Sansar". If you are one of them, please check Mandeep Singh's commet in the comment section where he explains exactly what it means :)

A Random Thought

Saw My Name Is Khan earlier in the week. I liked it...cried throughout the movie. Loved Shahrukh....you can probably tell that I'm a fan. Since I am not an expert on movies, I can't say if it was good or bad....all I can say is that I liked it.

I'd just like to mention one particular scene which got stuck in my mind. When Jimmy Shergill says to his wife after she's been attacked by someone for being Muslim post 9/11...."take it (the hijab) off.....God will understand but these people will not". I think that is so telling of the ways of the world today.

We're now living in a world where we fear other humans more than we do God.....which is very different from what it used to be. In India especially, religion and faith in the Almighty is BIG. He's the one that we turn to, the one that we fear....but all of that seems to be changing now. We've reached a point where we do believe that God is our own and he will understand why we did what we did.

There is so much anger and hatred...we seem to have totally lost sight of the saying "live n let live". Now again I'm no one to judge if the anger is justified or not....but is there no other way? Agreed if someone hurts me or my family and friends then there's no question of my not seething with anger too. Then I too want an eye for an eye.....I'm not ashamed to say that.But is this the way we want to move forward?

Tells us something about the way we're going and what we're going to leave behind for our children.

Another blast........

Another blast....Pune this time. Heard the news in the evening. Shock n horror as usual...switched on the TV....started getting details. Same story on....channels asking the government how they let it happen...the officials not saying much. What can they say. What can the news channels say. No one can say anything. It is the same story all over again.

We the people...so outraged, so full of anger.....I saw it all and then went out to meet my friends. And I didn't really think about it. I just went on with my life. I only remembered it once I got back home. Did it affect me....yes....but not enough...I think its stopped affecting me, especially after Mumbai. We've seen so much of it. As long as its not happening here...my life will go on as before.

I remember when it happened it Delhi...I was scared. The first time I had to go to GK 1 market, which was one of the sites of the blast, I had to say to myself that it has to be done. And I didn't hang around. I think that trip was more to show that aal izz well than anything else.

Right now there's a lot of talk happening....how did it happen, why wasn't it stopped, is the government incapable of stopping these attacks. A friend of mine says its really not possible to police every single person in our country....and I tend to agree.

We don't really want the policing. We want to do whatever we want to. No one should stop us. Democracy after all.

On the other hand...they really don't do a good enough job in trying to protect us. For example....a couple of months ago i went to the New Delhi Railway Station. And I was scared. So many people walking in....the cops just sitting on the side and letting them come and go. What if someone has a bomb in their luggage.....I was freaked out.

My question....if they can check the airports why is the railway station not checked. Could it be too many people? I don't really have any answers....just a bunch of questions.

Many more blasts will happen coz that's the world we live in...the reality of our lives.

Suraj Kund Crafts Mela 2010

I always wait for February to come…..not because of Valentine's Day, am too old for that, but because its time for the Suraj Kund Crafts Mela. Now I can tell you that this is something I absolutely do not miss…..haven’t for as many years as I can remember.

It’s always on from the 1st-15th and is a big crowd puller. You get to see all the different crafts of India since it has people from all the states and a few from other countries participating in it. A playground for children with lots of swings, lots of food to eat, lots of artists performing live from all over India.

After making numerous plans….I finally went today….. middle of the week since weekends are really crowded. The theme state this year is Rajasthan….my most favourite state which means that this year the focus of the Mela was on it. That’s not to say that the Mela was only about Rajasthan….it’s just their way of promoting a different state each year.

So I went, looked, admired, ate and watched a few artists performing. Looked at all the handicrafts on show from furniture to stone to marble to brass to bangles to jute to leather to clothes....you name it and it is there.

Chokhi Dhani...a famous resort of Jaipur had a food joint which is where I had lunch.....a vegetable mix of potato onion with Missi and Bajra roti along with garlic chutney....it was spicy and delicious. The place was done up in typical village style and made you feel like you were actually in an eating joint in rural Rajasthan.

One stall in particular I'd like to mention is the one put up by Aadi (Spastic Society of India) where they sell things made of handmade paper block printed by the children. They have wrapping paper, cards, envelopes, diaries, bags etc. I always make sure I buy from them.....my little gesture of trying to help those kids.

It was a fun afternoon spent outdoors and also a reminder of how beautiful and diverse Incredible India is.

Politics…the best form of entertainment at times.

I am not someone who takes a lot of interest in politics. Don’t understand it, don’t want to either. But once in a while I do tune in, especially when some breaking news catches my eye. And frankly today am totally tuned in. Just saw the “breaking news” of Amar Singh and Jaya Prada getting expelled and caught part of Amar Singh's press conference and frankly it was ummm hilarious. The pain, trauma and dissolution that he portrayed was a sight to behold. Now don’t get me wrong……have nothing against Amar Singh. I neither like him nor do I dislike him. And this post is not about him. My point is simply that I find politics at times to be the best form of entertainment. Simply because there’s so much drama and emotion. Everyone knows whatever’s being said is all just to get the maximum effect but everyone pays close attention to it nevertheless. And it’s kind of fun to hear people say one thing today and then say the opposite the next day as though what was said earlier was never said at all. Politicians seem to have a very selective memory most of the time. Thankfully the media and public do not. The media digs out what was said earlier and plays it along with what is being said today and frankly it’s a good laugh. At times better than Bollywood.

Jaipur….My Most Favourite Destination

I love Jaipur…..am just back from another trip and no matter how many times I go, it never loses its charm. For me there’s something romantic about the place. From the time I enter the city and am greeted with the walls of the fort which are steeped in history I am enthralled. Driving past the Amer Fort on to the road that’s carved in the hill to my first sight of the Jal Mahal…..it’s just pure delight to the senses. Normally that’s where I stop, at the Jaipur Trident which is bang opposite the Jal Mahal. For as many days as I am there, the lake is what greets me when I first open my eyes in the morning and I never ever get tired of the view.

Now having been there many many times I won’t call myself a tourist anymore. I rarely ever go sightseeing, coz I’ve seen it all before. Nor shopping. I have shopped for silver like there’s no tomorrow…..bought bags full of the famous blue pottery…..tons of tie n dye clothes. So none of that for me anymore. I go to get my dose of history. Of the view. Of the lake. Of the fort walls. Of the elephants and camels…..I love to see them walking around being part of the traffic. I love to go under the little arches as you enter Jaipur. I love the sight of the Hawa Mahal teaming with tourists. I love the sight of everything painted pink. Of colourful clothes hanging outside shops. I could go on and on and on. You’ve got the picture by now. I love Jaipur in winter….I love it in the rain…..i even love it in summer. That’s how much I love it.

A friend of mine says I must have some past connection with Jaipur….a sort of karmic connection and I always laugh and say that maybe I was once the queen or princess or someone from the royal family who still feels the pull from that other past life. It calls me time and again and I always hear that call and go.

The only thing I hate about Jaipur is the traffic. The way people drive there actually drives me to road rage. I mean anywhere anytime they just seem to cut in. At times I actually feel like getting out of the car and whacking someone. I control myself and just honk. Long n hard and almost constantly. It’s a crowded city which is growing at a fast pace but not enough is getting done to help it develop. But that’s the story with all of India I guess. So I’ll grin and bear it.

To tell you a bit about this trip, was lucky enough to be there when the Jaipur Literary Festival was on and that was an experience in itself. Even though I only went for a few hours, it gave me the chance to soak up the atmosphere and listen to some great people reading and talking. I heard Shabana Azmi reading from her mother Shaukat Kaifi’s memoirs who was later joined by Javed Aktar. They shared little anecdotes of what life at home was all about. A reading of Tughlaq by Om Puri, Girish Kannad and Nandita Puri. The festival was held at Diggi Palace which is an old converted haveli built in the 1960’s surrounded by acres of beautifully manicured gardens. The setting and decor again full of history and colour which is the trademark of Rajasthan. Spotted a lot of famous faces there, Meghnad Desai, Alexander McCall Smith, William Dalrymple, to name a few, and was, frankly really chuffed to be rubbing shoulders with the who’s who of the literary world. I hope I get a chance to go again…..God willing.

Here I Go....

So here I go on my way to writing the first post for Lost Thoughts. Talking doesn't come easily to me especially if it's about what I really think and feel but am going to try real hard. This blog is going to be all about my take on things which affect me. It could be something I feel personally or a cause which touches my heart. It could also be about something which makes me really mad. It might not always be intelligent or make any kind of sense to you, the reader, but, hang on.....some of it might just strike a chord.

To tell you a bit about myself.....I am a pretty normal, boring, average kind of person who lives mostly in her own dream world! Need to be nudged a lot of times for people to catch my attention. Am a great listener but talking is not my forte. I love to spend a lot of time with myself and actually manage to do it. My family shakes their head in disgust and always have to drag me out of my room. Friends though, are different. Love to spend time with them though that too has it's time limit. Not for me spending a whole day chitchatting. A few hours and I'm done. Ready to run back to my room and be alone. Bet it sounds horrible to you. But that's me :)

Work.....yes, I used to work but am currently practicing the art of chilling and totally enjoying myself. Am actually surprised at how much fun I'm having doing nothing and not following a routine of any sort. Freedom to do what I want only when I want. Before taking this sabbatical I was working for a company which manufactures accent furniture for exports. I loved my job to the extent of being a workaholic at times. One fine day though I realised that I wasn't enjoying it as much as I used to so it was time to leave. And I did. I am lucky to be able to take this break in order to recharge my creative batteries.

I studied Literature in college and went on to do fashion design but since I'm really not into clothes I chucked that and got into furniture. Anyways I love home stuff more than I like clothes....in fact my only interest in clothes is limited to getting just what I need. I never even peep into a clothing store if am out shopping unless I absolutely have to get some clothes. See told you I was boring.

How do I pass my time these day.......time flies when you're having fun. I read, listen to music, tweet, facebook, go out......the day goes. To tell you the truth I am really really busy doing nothing. And yes now that I've started this blog I hope to spend a lot of quality time writing. Amen to that.

So this is it about me and myself. Not a bad start....think am doing OK at this. Hopefully will continue to do better with each post that I write. Hope you liked what you read and even if you didn't, please keep it to yourself. Thank you and God Bless.